I'm a Senior Citizen

I'm the life of the party ... even when it lasts until 8 p.m.

I'm very good at opening childproof caps with a hammer.

I'm usually interested in going home before I get to where I am going.

I'm good on a trip for at least an hour without my aspirin, beano, antacid........

I'm the first one to find the bathroom wherever I go.

I'm awake many hours before my body allows me to get up.

I'm smiling all the time because I can't hear a word you're saying.

I'm very good at telling stories.....over and over and over and over and......

I'm aware that other people's grandchildren are not as bright as mine.

I'm so cared for: long term care, eye care, private care, dental care....

I'm not grouchy, I just don't like traffic, waiting, crowds, wild children, politicians....

I'm sure everything I can't find is in a secure place, after all I put it in a safe place.

I'm wrinkled, saggy, lumpy, and that's just my left leg.

I'm having trouble remembering simple words like, huh.........

I'm realizing that aging is not for sissies... (Actually a Bette Davis quote!)

I'm anti-everything now: anti-fat, anti-smoke, anti-noise, anti-inflammatory.....

I'm walking more (to the bathroom) and enjoying it less.

I'm going to reveal what goes on behind closed doors... absolutely nothing!

I wonder why they let children become doctors, lawyers, policeman nowadays.

I'm in the initial stage of my golden years: SS, CD's, IRA'S, AARP.....

I'm wondering, if you're only as old as you feel, how could I be alive at 150?

I'm supporting all movements now ... by eating bran, and raisins.

I'm a walking storeroom of facts.....I've just can't remember where the storeroom is.

I'm a SENIOR CITIZEN and I think I am having the time of my life!!!!